私の在処

Lately I feel like I'm doing well

I should be properly handling what's entrusted to me

A life not as inconvenient as they say

It's okay, I'm doing fine

But, I wonder why

My smiling face feels disgusting

Before that, why am I even smiling?

I'm just pasting yesterday as it is

Repeating every day

Before I know it, only my shell is kept alive

The inside has stopped breathing

Numbers lined up in a world that abandoned color

Give an answer without mistake

Even if that leads to tragedy

Still, it's the correct answer

The heart only malfunctions

If you say it's unnecessary

Then why do you try tying it with a belt?

Did you attach it to everyone without fail?

It's only painful, only depressing

Because something like this is here

If it can be thrown away, let me throw it away

Because I'm still afraid of dying

I want everything to be meaningless, worthless, and disappear

Yet I think, cling, and wish pathetically

My fragments that fled from the blurred vision

May they be able to smile in a distant place

It's not me, yet it's me

It's not me, because it's me

I dig my claws into my heart and put it away in a box

So that worries cannot be spat out

As time passes, it rots and decays

They say it becomes as if it never was

Yet it remains without ever disappearing

Stubbornly, so much so that it's dear

If I give it a name and hold it gently

I end up thinking such things

No matter how precious things I treasured

That warmth I loved so much

If it's not needed, then right here, now

Kill all my emotions

Make it so there's no distinction either

If we can become equally happy

See, now

No longer will I suffer, grieve, or laugh

No longer will I rejoice, thrill, or sing

The old fragments peeled off and falling

May the wind carry them away

My face reflected in the window was smiling properly

"I see, so you were able to go there"

This story ends here